Archive - Thursday, 7 February 2002


Find by date

Other ways to search

Also look for

Never miss anything again. Sign up for our RSS news feeds and Newsletters.

Ouch!

I went to Garden Answers

To ask about my ants.

They're red and fierce and everywhere,

But not yet in my pants

Thank goodness, as they bite like hell;

They even nip my pals as well!

I questioned that nice Geoffrey Smith

On what should be my action

For dealing with the little beasts

And this was his reaction.

"Simply leave them where they are.

They're harmless and they will not mar

Your garden in the slightest way,

In fact they're very good

As nourishment for woodpeckers."

That's if they're in a wood!

They're not, of course, they're up my arm

And doing me a lot of harm!

I'm covered in a nasty rash.

(That formic acid stings!)

I wish they'd make a home elsewhere,

The horrid little things.

I'll have to get those ants to go

But how to do it, I don't know!

Can anyone lend me a woodpecker?

Updated: 11:42 Thursday, August 02, 2001